By Nkhensani Mthombeni
In his latest book, Broken Men and the Women Who Love Them, author and counsellor Coach Vince Xitsunge, writes about the impact of unhealed trauma and rejection.
Drawing on his own experiences, Xitsunge looks at his journey from being a womaniser and an irresponsible man of God to finding healing and redemption.
He believes that criminal behaviour comes from unresolved emotional wounds.
“Unhealed trauma can transform a person into someone they’re not meant to be. It’s not uncommon for broken men to become womanisers or criminals,” Vince, 46, told Scrolla.Africa.
He remembers how the absence of love and acceptance from his parents led him down a path of hurting others, especially women.
At 22, despite being an active born-again Christian and a church leader, Vince found himself in the middle of a life of lies, having impregnated two women on two separate occasions.
This was the beginning of a downward spiral into sin and sexual immorality, eventually leading to his church closing.
It wasn’t until he reconciled with his parents at the age of 35 that Vince began the journey toward healing. Tragically, his mother passed away eight years ago, followed by his father last year.
Now a husband and father of four, Vince is open about his past with his children.
His book is not only a cautionary tale but also a guide for women on the dangers of attempting to “save” broken men.
“In trying to save them, you may end up getting hurt yourself. Focus instead on nurturing better sons, who will surpass their fathers in character,” he advises.
Vince has launched an online prayer programme aimed at the revival of the nation and the restoration of families.
Pictured above: Coach Vince Xitsunge.
Image source: Supplied
